Dear last year,
You were really good to me. You showed me more of who I am, parts of me that I didn’t even know existed.
You showed me disappointments, in the form of losing houses we fell in love with and a career I thought was a dream. You showed me that you can do everything and anything for someone you work for (or this can be applied to a lot of things in life) but that in the end, sometimes things are just too good to be true for a reason. Sometimes you need to walk away when you realize that being in an environment where your absolute best is never good enough is detrimental to your mental health, happiness, and well being.
This year taught me to run like Forest Gump in those situations. Run at the first sign of a red flag. Your instincts are instilled in you for a reason…use them.
But with these, you lead the way for me to even better paths. You made me aware of a strength I didn’t know I had when it comes to standing up for myself and knowing what I want and deserve.
Within you, 2018, I learned that it’s okay to just….need time. To decompress after these disappointments and disappear for awhile, if you need to.
I learned that “FOMO,” or “fear of missing out” is basically all in your head and I have gotten insanely good at appreciating what I have rather than comparing to others. We all feel bad with social media but I think it’s more about how you look at things. Like, seeing someone go on a beautiful vacation and feeling happy for them and also being like “that’s great and I would love to go there someday too- but after we buy our house! Because I have exciting things coming my way that are more important right now than traveling.” I also know myself well enough now to look at someone’s photos of being out and filtering my own thoughts-like thinking, wait, do I even want to be doing that right now? Actually no, I’m super happy being on my couch watching this movie with wine.
I learned that the hustle is real and you can damn well get anything that you want if you work hard enough. This means you don’t always listen to people who tell you that there’s no way you can travel while you are not working for 2 months (yup and I never did put up my Canada travel post- but I will!) or that you can’t possibly pay your bills through selling on Poshmark?! Watch me, yo.
Dear new year,
I have to say, you are starting off with a bang!
Please continue to teach me valuable lessons.
Please bring me a house I love with enough space for a chicken, pygmy goat, and another pupper. (or 2…?)
Please help me with discipline and consistency. This goes with all things: bullet journaling, blogging, Poshmark, gym,yoga, etc.
Please allow me to finally actually learn the ukulele or guitar. (I see a theme here- again, consistency and discipline?!)
Please help me to continue stepping even further outside of my comfort zone.